More Funny Wedding Stories

We started dating in November of 1985. People in the church we attended felt we should be married, because my husband was called to preach and I am a piano player.  So, I’m not even sure about when he asked me; I can't remember if he ever did!

We were married on February 15th, 1986, at 7:00 P.M. Before the wedding started, we had tried our rings on that we had borrowed for the ceremony — they fit great! Everything was set for a perfect wedding evening. Well, it came time for the two flower girls and ring bearer to walk down the aisle. About halfway down the aisle, the ring bearer threw the pillow down and refused to pick it up! One of the flower girls picked the pillow up, chunked it at the ring bearer and said “CARRY THIS.” Well, that was just the start of an eventful night!

The ring bearer didn't want to stand, so he sat down on the step and put one of his pant legs inside his boot. He was stealing the show! When it came time for me to walk down the aisle, my Dad was so nervous, he was almost in a trot. When I would say “slow down,” he would almost make me trip over my dress. I was so relieved to finally get to the altar with my future husband! As the wedding progressed, the minister told us to repeat after him. I was nervous and said, “I thee Tonya take thee Danny to be my awfulwedded husband”.... I was so embarrassed at that point!

When it was time for the rings,  Danny was trying to put the ring on my finger and I guess I was so nervous that my finger swelled. Danny said, “Oh noooo!” The whole wedding party was about to lose it. Then I went to put the ring on his finger and his finger had swelled too, so I said, "Oh noooo! " as well — everyone was chuckling by that time!

As we left the church after the reception, we saw that they had decorated the car. They had put the words “JUST MARRED" on the back!

The night after we were married, my husband had been asked to preach at a neighboring church. I had only been his wife for 24 hours. The service went great! At the end of his sermon, he asked the congregation to bow their heads and said, “Would my wife come to the piano?” I bowed my head like everyone else and looked around (out of the corner of my eye) for his wife. A lady setting next to me said, "You’re his wife!" Oh yes...that was interesting.

I wouldn't trade these memories for anything. God has been good! You would think that a wedding that had so much excitement in it would seem fast, but that evening seemed like an eternity.  I cannot say our marriage has been perfect, but we celebrated 25 years last year and it has been worth the journey. Whether he asked me to marry him or not, I may not remember — but, I made a vow to this man and I would gladly do it again. He has been my best friend and will be—“until death do us part.”  — Tonya D.


You Take My Breath Away
When I was a young girl, my family went to a wedding at our church. There were three brothers and the groom, if I remember correctly. The brothers were holding lit candles during the vows, and they began fainting. Later, we learned that the lit candles were taking their oxygen, thus they fell down. It was funny, but because of the wedding no one was laughing, of course. Later the church banned having anyone hold lit candles. I am over 70 years old and haven't forgotten that wedding! I went to many wonderful weddings, but that tops them all. I have been married nearly 53 years now to my high-school sweetheart.  — Ann G.


Holy Rollers
We got married on December 28, 1962. All the participants were home for the holidays from college. I went to get my hair fixed that morning, and they put two beauticians on my head of hair. One was rolling one side one way and one the other (my hair was naturally curly). You can imagine how it came out!

 

We were getting married at my college church because my home pastor had passed away. It was 50 miles away. My mom was making my wedding cake, as well as sandwiches for us to eat after the rehearsal, which was right before the wedding. She forgot the sandwiches and had to run to a grocery store to buy all the "fixings." The best man, my hubby’s college roommate, didn't catch the right bus and was late for rehearsal, so we made him an usher and he was upset.

I think the wedding went off without a hitch, but afterward realized we had made no arrangements for pictures to be made. So one of my college friends ran to a store to buy some film. Almost everything that could go wrong did!  If we make it to Dec 28, 2012 we will have made it 50 years.  — Wanona S.


Catch Me If You Can
It was June, 1971, as my new bride and I left the chapel. Her brother and my cousin decided to chase us through the little East Texas town where we were married.  As I tried to lose them, a cop pulled us both over and gave us tickets.  Since I was not a local, they made us go the police station and pay the fine on the spot for both of us, which took just about all the cash I had.  And while my bride waited in the running car in 90 degree weather, the car overheated. We had to let the car cool off before adding coolant, which I did not have money for either.  After a couple of hours sitting in front the small town police station, we finally got out of town and on to the honeymoon. On top of that, our cousins wrote all over my car with white shoe polish and in the hot Texas sun, it burned into the paint job. We could read "Just Married" and assorted words and phrases until we sold the car two years later!  — John M.


Nailed It
I was coming down the aisle when my wedding gown got caught on a nail.  When I turned, my husband to be thought I changed my mind and was going to leave!   — Betty S.


Enjoy the Ride
This is my funny story from my youngest daughter's wedding:
It was an outdoor wedding on a beautiful summer day in the mountains.  My daughter wanted to have a white horse and buggy bring her down the hill to the guests and her groom, but we couldn't find one.  So, instead, she rented an "open wagon" pulled by a couple of horses, and we decorated it.  She and all the bridesmaids were in this very open wagon coming down a very bumpy hill.  :-)  As they began their descent, they had to hold on for dear life not to fall into the wagon bed!!  They were laughing all the way and the guests had no idea what was happening.   — Glenda D.


Send In the Clown
We had ordered tuxedos for the groomsmen about three months before the wedding. The morning of the wedding, all the guys were getting dressed, and my husband, the groom, came out looking like he had on clown pants! He first thought they had mixed up the sizes with the best man or someone else. No, out came the best man and the groomsman with theirs fitting perfectly. His mother said, “Well, maybe I can pin them.” He was not having that—he looked ridiculous! They had to drive 15 miles away, get the correct size and get back before the wedding, which at that point was only about one hour later. You guessed it—he was late. But at least his pants fit!   — Brenda S.

 

Long Train Running
When I was about 3 or 4 years old, my Aunt Jane and Uncle Bob Hubbard got married in 1941 in Jamestown, Pennsylvania.  My Aunt Jane told me I could be in the wedding and could help carry the train.  I was so excited, because I loved trains!  I was so disappointed when I realized Aunt Jane's “train” was anything but a "choo-choo"!

While walking along helping carry the train with my uncle's nephew, I needed to blow my nose. So I did — wiping my nose on the "train"!  That made for a longstanding wedding story in my family that has been told countless times down through the years.  I guess that was an embarrassing moment for my mother, who was her sister's matron of honor.  All of this didn't deter my aunt and uncle from having a long life together.  They have both gone on to glory now, as have my Mom and Dad, but the story lives on with my brothers and cousins to this day!  —Tom B.


Packing a Punch
This happened at my daughter and son-in-law's wedding on December 28, 1987.  We had frozen balls of the punch that we were serving at the reception in our church’s freezer.  As the friends who were working in the kitchen needed more punch, they mixed it up and were supposed to throw several punch balls into that.  Unbeknownst to us, someone in the congregation had put whole onions in the freezer in the same kind of baggies.  So as our friends started throwing the "punch balls" into the punch bowl, they started screaming and carrying on.  Floating on top of the punch were these big onion balls!!!  It made for an extremely funny and embarrassing time for the punch ladies! We just fished the onion balls out and served the punch as is!   We still get a lot of enjoyment from that one. — Lyn R. 


Windy Forecast
I attended a wedding where the candle lighters could not get the candles to stay lit because the air conditioner vents kept blowing them out. — Joahn R.


Rescue Me
I attended a cousin's wedding and when the bride and groom knelt for prayer, those peeping were amused to see on the groom's shoe soles   HE LP.  It was a bit amusing at a very solemn time!

At my own wedding, my husband had a small brother who was very attached to him.  The family tried to keep him in the back part of the church with relatives. During the service, he managed to get away and proceeded to crawl towards the front of the church and was caught by the feet at the last seat possible before getting to the altar.  He was going to his brother regardless of the ceremony taking place!  — Phyllis S.


Laughter is Good Medicine
My husband, Roger, is a registered nurse, so we decided to do something other than the usual "you may kiss the bride" during our wedding ceremony. We planned it with the pastor. After he pronounced us husband and wife, he said,  "You may now perform CPR." With that, Roger leaned over and gave me my first kiss as his wife.  Everyone burst out laughing and clapping and we loved it! — Laurel W.


Held Hostage
I met my husband, Jim, in January of 1960, when he was visiting my neighbor. I was a senior in high school, and three months later we were engaged. He joined the Army reserves, and I planned the wedding while he was away for six months in boot camp. He came home and we were married Nov. 5th, 1960 — it was a beautiful wedding. At the reception, two of my dad's best friends kidnapped me, and as we were driving around we passed a Steak & Shake. I mentioned being hungry as I hadn't eaten all day due to the excitement, so they turned back and we went to Steak & Shake. Back then there was curb service, and much to the surprise of the car hop, there I was a bride of 18 years old with TWO older men. They immediately said they had kidnapped me from the wedding, and that my father didn't want me to marry the man of my dreams. She really wasn't sure if it was a joke or not. I did order my fries and steak burger; we sat in the car and I ate — it was sooo good! Then they took me back to the reception, and needless to say, my NEW husband was not impressed…but he got over it and we had a wonderful rest of the night.

He passed away due to complications from Alzheimer's on Oct. 17th, 2008, just a few weeks before our 48th anniversary. I still love Steak & Shake and think of him every time I order my steak burger and fries...I cherish every memory of him and praise God for the years we had. We had three children and now I have two beautiful granddaughters.  God is good!  — Marlene W.


Gone Awry
They brought the cake in a convertible with the top down on a hot July day and it shifted some to the side. I lost my shoe in the ceremony as they asked us to kneel. It made a loud noise on the wood floor, which sounded like a gun and scared my husband to be! Later in the service, I tried to make his ring fit on his right hand while he quietly protested and then got a little louder. We made it to the reception only to have neighborhood yokels pull him from reception to “shiveree” him. We went looking for him and they grabbed me, put me in a wheelbarrow and made my new husband push me around the town square! Halfway around, I pulled off my shoes and ran for it, but they brought us back. We finally made it back to the reception and then went on home, only to be accompanied by family. — Wallace Joyce B.


Snot Funny
Oh, this was so many years ago, but the memories remain.  I was a young single woman.  My friend was getting married and I was in the bridal party.  I had a bad cold, but the excitement of the day pushed that aside.  We were waiting to walk down the aisle and I was standing next to the bride.  I let loose with a big sneeze, but I didn't think anything about it.  The music played, and all of us in the bridal party walked down the aisle. While we waited for the music to start for the bride another sneeze threatened to come, and I thought, “Oh no! No Kleenex! Oh well, I think it's okay.”  So then, here came the bride.  As I looked I could see something swaying back and forth in time to the music at the bottom of her veil.  As she came closer to my disbelief — sure enough — my snot was at the bottom of her veil!  I thought, good, nobody sees it.  But, of course, it didn't end there!  When her Dad lifted her veil, the snot flew over her and hit the groom on the forehead.  We all pointed and laughed at the groom, but then the fingers were pointing at me.  Why?  I had a booger hanging out of my nose.  At that time I turned to the wedding guests and said, "It's snot over ‘til it's over!"  I took a bow and, of course, used my bouquet of flowers as a Kleenex....ewww.   — Gloria M.


Cold Feet
I will share what happened on our wedding day, which was 51 years ago on Valentine’s Day. We were on our way, when we had a blowout on a bridge. We got stopped and Bob and our friend Jerry, who was riding with us, got out and changed the tire. While doing that, Bob tried to talk our friend into turning around! He said, “No way — you have come this far, and we are going all the way.” Thank you, Jerry! We are still very happily married and living by the lake. — Bernice R.


Last Laugh
We got married on July 8th, 1984, after dating for about three years. We were engaged for one and a half years, and my mom tried to get everyone I trusted to stop me, because I was born with cerebral palsy. So on our wedding day, she wasn’t happy at all, and her unhappiness showed to everyone there. She felt that “two cripples” wouldn’t make it! During the wedding, she didn’t smile, although people were calling out “Smile, Elsie!” She didn’t do anything that day but make faces, grumble, cry and everything she could do to let her feelings show! 

Well, today we have been married for 27 years and are looking for many more ahead, as we continue to put God first in our lives. — Lenda Faye O. 


Whirlwind Romance
My husband Chuck and I were married on Valentine’s Day in 1959, 53 years ago. Chuck was in college at the time, so we had a very small wedding at the home of my parents. Because he was in college 90 miles away, he wanted to get married on Friday, so we could have the whole weekend together. I’m not superstitious, but I didn’t want to get married on Friday the 13th! Besides that, Valentine’s Day is much more romantic. We met on a blind date and two months — yes, two months! — later, we were married. — Judy J.

 

Source: http://www.homecomingmagazine.com/article/just-marred-funny-wedding-stories-part-2/

Posted on March 21, 2017 .